An emotionally devastating dystopian romance that cuts to the bone and refuses to let go.

In her first foray into dystopian fiction, Deidra Duncan delivers a gut-wrenching, unflinching, and deeply romantic story of rebellion, survival, and forbidden love. If like me you loved Love Sick you’ll recognize her signature banter and emotional intensity.

Until I Die is a brutal and brilliant descent into a shattered world that somehow still leaves room for love to bloom in the ruins.

Note: This post contains affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you if you make a purchase through them. I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion. Thanks for supporting my book-loving habits!

The Story

“In the ruins of a nation, two enemies risk everything for a chance at justice… and each other.”

Set in the aftermath of a catastrophic event known as the Fracture, Until I Die explores a bleak future where the United States has fallen and the New American Order (NAO) has risen. A violent regime built on control, submission, and the complete erasure of women's rights. Resistance is dangerous. Love is lethal.

Sophia Reeves is a soldier of the Defiance, a resistance movement barely holding ground. When she's ordered to become a contact for a high-ranking regime officer turned spy, Blood Colonel Lucas Scott, she’s faced with an impossible task. He’s supposed to be the enemy. But week after week, she discovers there’s far more to him than brutality.

He's haunted. He’s grieving. And maybe… he’s worth trusting.

Their bond is forged in shadow, growing in tension, danger, and reluctant desire. But their missions grow bloodier. The cost of betrayal grows higher. And the fragile hope they dare to share may come at the price of everything.

The World

Duncan doesn’t sugarcoat the horrors of war. This isn’t a post-apocalyptic survival fantasy. It’s a politically charged, soul-stripping, painfully real-feeling dystopian story that mirrors the terrifying echoes of history and the anxieties of our present.

The world-building is chilling in its plausibility: the rise of fascism, the erasure of bodily autonomy, the cruelty masked as order. Duncan draws sharp lines between power and powerlessness and then smudges them to reveal the moral rot on both sides.

Trigger warning: This book deals with incredibly heavy content including war violence, rape, psychological abuse, torture, and death. These aren’t peripheral details, they’re core to the emotional arc and woven into the narrative with intentional clarity. That said, Duncan handles the material with gravity and sensitivity, focusing on emotional fallout over intensely gory details.

The Romance

High Stakes, Low Spice, Maximum Emotion

This is not your standard enemies-to-lovers romance. Sophia and Lucas are true enemies...ideological, tactical, and lethal. Their connection simmers under layers of distrust, obligation, and fear. There’s no flirtation. No easy banter. Their story unfolds in stolen moments and aching silences. And when the emotional dam finally breaks, it’s not fireworks, it’s devastation.

The spice level is minimal (about one chili pepper). There’s an open-door moment, but it’s subtle, almost blink-and-you-miss-it. There’s no vulgarity, no drawn-out description. And that’s by design. The intimacy here isn’t physical it’s emotional. It’s about choosing vulnerability in a world that punishes it.

The Main Characters

Sophia is a compelling heroine. Hardened by grief, sharpened by trauma, and burning with a need for justice, she’s already given up everything for the Defiance. But Until I Die asks what happens when survival requires more than strength. When the cause you’ve devoted yourself to asks for too much. Sophia’s arc is one of self-preservation and self-sacrifice both carried with equal weight.

Lucas is morally gray PERFECTION. As a Blood Colonel, he’s known as a ruthless killer. But behind the mask lies a man broken by what he’s done and what he’s still doing. His transformation isn’t instant or clean. It's layered with guilt, secrecy, and the crushing burden of double agency. He doesn’t want redemption. He wants justice. But he finds something dangerously close to salvation in Sophia.

The Supporting characters like Theo and Williams add even more complexity. They’re fighting for the right cause, but their actions? Not always noble. They manipulate, sacrifice, and strategize with cold efficiency. In other words, they feel real. Duncan doesn’t offer heroes and villains she offers survivors.

Themes In Until I Die

  • Rebellion vs. Compliance: The book explores what resistance costs, especially for women. Sophia isn’t just fighting a regime. She’s fighting to remain herself.
  • Trauma & Recovery: Both Sophia and Lucas are deeply scarred. Their connection doesn’t erase that it acknowledges it.
  • Hope in Darkness: This is not a light book, but it is a human one. Love doesn’t save the world here, but it matters. It reminds us what’s worth saving.

Until I Die is a razor-sharp, emotionally intense, dystopian romance. It's not light. It’s not easy. But it’s unforgettable. Duncan proves that on top of giving us incredible contemporary romances with top tier banter she can take us to the edge of a crumbling world and still make us believe in love.

If you want a book that stays with you,one that makes you think, cry, and ache this is it!